Joke

Joke jokes

I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."

You know you're high when you hold all your pineapples hostage and yell, "SpongeBob, I know you're in there!"

What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?

A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.

What’s the best part about sex with 28-year-olds?

There are twenty of them.

What did the banana say to the vibrator?

"Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!"

WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"

What do you get when you cross a shark and a computer? Computer bytes!

What did the two crewmates say when they were hanging on a rope? Polus up!

A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.

The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.

The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.

The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"

The bartender agrees without hesitation.

The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.

"WTF!" the man shouts.

The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"