Job jokes

Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? He took a day off.

What was Frankenstein's second job? -- He was a bodybuilder.

Yo mama is so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and walked out with a job application.

Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory?

She was fed up with the hole business.

I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. -- A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."

"Well, I'm your man," I replied, "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."

I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

None, that's a hardware problem.