What makes 9/11 an inside job?
Someone started calling it 10/7.
How is being in the military like getting a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
Asian Grading scale: A- Average.
B- Half Average.
C- Stupid idiot!
D- FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN DO CALCULUS!
F- FORGOTTEN FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN GET A JOB AT MCDONALDS!
I think i would like a job cleaning mirrors, it's just something I could really see myself doing.
What’s worse than getting a job at McDonald’s?
Not getting the job at McDonald’s.
My manager told me to have a good day. So I didn't go into work.
Being unemployed is like watching our president fall over himself on the stairs.
There’s no hope.
What do you call someone who fixes walls?
Juan, probably.
Boss: Can I do a reference check?
Me: I don’t have a...
*sensei appears*
Me: oh no
Sensei: He was a good student, but he lacked kizma.
Boss: What's kiz...
Sensei:😈
Me: Oh no, here we go.
Sensei: Kizma AS-
Finally my father came early from office today. I am very happy.
He was fired from his job.
The man fired from the World Trade Center on September 10.
That is just plain wrong.
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
One time, I worked at 3 jobs at the same time and my boss said it was illegal.
It got too out of hand and I got spanked.
I have said a ton of jokes in my lifetime.
But I got fired from that job.
I work at a movie studio.
Unfortunately, the team I was working with was useless.
The team:
My boss found my permanent record at the orphanage, and he’s mad. I got fired...
What is the difference between paying $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from an able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole?
If you give $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00. 💸😁
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
