I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.
The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.
Every time I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.
There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, so I unplug them.
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
Why did the booty get a job?
To make ends meet!
Why couldn't the booty be a conductor?
It couldn't stay on track.
What is the difference between kinky and perverted?
Kinky is when an abled-bodied gay male is receiving an anonymous blow job from a physically disabled gay male under the handicapped stall at a rest area.
Perverted is when an abled-bodied gay male has to give a Klondike Bar to a physically disabled gay male to receive an anonymous blow job under the handicapped stall at a rest area.
Why do asses make terrible spies?
Because they always CRACK under pressure.
What do you call a rapper who can’t RHYME?
Unemployed
Why did the rapper get a job at the bank?
Because he wanted to make some RAP DEPOSITS
I used to be a baker, but I decided to quit my job and stick my dough inside WOMEN’S bakeries.
Why did the rapper become a gardener?
Because he wanted to drop some ROOT RHYMES
Why did the rapper become a carpenter?
To build some SOLID BARS.
I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job.
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
Leo must be an INTERIOR DECORATOR... because when she enters a room, it becomes UGLY.
What are three things you can't give a black guy?
A fat lip, a black eye, and a job.
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
