Jew jokes
What did Hitler get for his birthday?
A G.I. Jew and an Easy Bake Oven.
Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?
Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!
What’s the difference between a Black man and a Jew?
One was born burnt.
Who do the United States owe trillions of dollars to?
Jew-piter.
Roses are red, the Jews hate goys,
Union of Creepy Janitors (UCJ) opposes school choice.
Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:
Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)
East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)
Jew...Rey (Ray)
Black...BB-8 (BBC)
Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)
German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)
Another Nazi joke.
Did Nazi that coming?
Did Jew?
What is the difference between a black man and Jew?
One was born burnt.
What does a Jew expecting guests say?
"Oy, vey, are they here yet?"
A Christian, a Jew, and a Catholic walk into a bar. The Christian says, “Where’s Mohammed?”
Q: What is Hitler's least favorite grocery store?
A: Jew-Osco
How are Jews and potatoes different?
A potato keeps its skin.
What's a Jew's worst nightmare?
A frozen bank account.
Why do Jews suck at mugging?
Because all they ask for is the spare change in your pockets.
What do Jews and Black people have in common?
Living off welfare checks.
Q: Name a murderer?
A: Jews: Hitler. Russians: Stalin. Chinese: Mao. Americans: Bin Laden. Aborted fetus: My mom.
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
Q: What do you call a religious Wookie?
A: Jewbacca.
When God made Chinese, he said, "DON'T LOOK!" and the Chinese said, "Why?"
And God replied, "You won't want to be fruitful and multiply if you saw where you are putting that thing."
It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.
When God made White Man, he said, "NEVER SHUT YOUR EYES!" and the white man said, "Why?"
And God replied, "You need to keep an eye out for the Chinese, one day they will out number you."
It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.
Then the white man said, "There is a white genocide!"
And the survivors of the Holocaust said, "All these Europeans killed each other, so a white genocide is accurate. White killed white."
Then the Chinese said, "Thank you, we take your land now."
And the Jews said, "But we are God's chosen people!"
And the Chinese said, "Yes, every time God show up you get bullied! You might want to worship someone else!"
And the Jews said, "Why are you Chinese so lucky, you can't even see, you blind!"
And the Chinese said, "Jesus say be in the world not of the world, so don't go looky looky at the world then."
It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.
There is a Mexican, white guy, a Jew, and a Black man on top of the Empire State Building.
First, the Mexican and the Jew throw themselves off of the building saying, "This is for my people!"
Then the Black man is next up to jump and says, "This is for my people!"
And throws the White man off of the building.