it's jokes
A man entered the bank branch and asked the teller to withdraw his account balance. The teller debited his account and gave the man all his money. Then the man counted the money and asked the teller to deposit it back into his account.
The teller asked the man why he withdrew the money and deposited it back. Then the man replied, "I wanted to make sure all my money is safe and tallies with my records."
Lol
Why does the blonde stand in a corner when she's cold?
Because it's 90 degrees.
Why is it cold in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
Stop saying negative shit about dark humor jokes! If it bugs you that bad, then go away! That'll solve everything but world hunger and failed abortion.
How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.
Why is a ghost so predictable?
Because you can see right through it.
A guy goes onto a rooftop bar and is sitting next to a guy who says he’s drinking a magical drink. He asks, “What’s so magical about it?” The guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. The other tries, but falls off and dies.
The bartender shakes his head and says, “Y’know, you’re a real jerk when you’re drunk, Superman.”
I'm jealous of your heart because it's pumping in you and I'm not.
Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
It's telling that Ye gets more offended when he's called a gayfish than a Nazi.
I spat on a blind kid and told him it was raining.
Damn, this computer stopped working. It's got autism.
What's the difference between a cat and a banana? It's hard to peel a cat.
And I blame it on the al-al-al-cohol, but if I were you, I wouldn’t kiss your mom on the mouth at all.
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson? Because it's a family company.
What do you give a dog with a fever?
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog!
When an orphan takes a selfie, is that its family photo?
I replaced "Jingle Bells" with "Jiggle Balls"... "Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride on jiggly balls today!"
Why did the banana like the movie?
Because it was apeeling.
I’m giving in my two week resignation to life... it’s not you ... it’s me!!!