IT jokes

What's an orphan's favorite toy?

A boomerang, because it came back unlike their parents.

When you put the chicken in the oven, it goes down, and the oven explodes. The oven and smoke and everything is fire and on fire and flies to the grass, and all goes back.

If cancer was a person I’d shake their hand and say: "Thank you for your service."

Sorry if it’s too far, but don’t come here if you can’t take it.

What did one cheek say to the other cheek?

"It is a squash in here!"

Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?

It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.

Why can't I have any chocolate ice cream for dessert? Because I made it disappear up your ass for good.

Why did the dog go into the fire?

Because it wanted to be a hot dog!

"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."

"Did I do that?"

Somebody’s son said, "Mom, my dick has white stuff coming out of it." She said, "Oh, good one, son, so when’s the baby coming?"

A man walks in to the doctor.

He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."

Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!

Yo mama so ugly, it made the world stop spinning.

Why couldn’t the bike stand up?

Because it was “two tired”!

I was reading a book about gravity. It was so hard to put down!

Want to hear a pizza joke?

Never mind, it’s too cheesy.

There was this intern that worked at an orphanage, and she burnt it down. Luckily, she doesn't have to tell her parents.

Dark jokes are like food, not everybody gets it.

How do you measure the circumference of Uranus?

By the rings around it.

Lady: Will you fuck me?

Man: No, I don’t have a penis.

Lady pulls down man's pants and looks in them. "Yes, you do!" she says.

Man: Oh, I forgot it was there.

I had a good night, and I love it when you get a good walk and you get to.

Have you heard of the invention of the shovel? It's groundbreaking!