Isnt jokes

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.

Aunt: Stop telling the kids Santa isn't real.

Me: Stop telling them their dad is going to get milk.

Why can't disabled people make jokes?

Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?

How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?

If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.

How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?

It isn't hard.

Two blondes fall down a well. One says to the other one, "Isn't it dark down here?" She replies, "I don't know. I can't see."

ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.

Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Why aren’t orphan jokes funny?

The punchline isn’t apparent.

Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.

If you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that's self-harm.

If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that's acting.

It isn't any of those if it's suicide.

Calling Alabama's football team an astonishment would be the biggest understatement of the century, especially since they continuously catch balls from someone who isn't related to them.

Nike isn't helpful for suicidal people. You can't tell them to "Just Do It."

The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.

My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!

Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.

Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!

I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is, then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.

What's the difference between my arm and my stomach? My stomach isn't ripped.

I cry a lot for someone who isn’t even properly hydrated.

Being an orphan isn't all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family-sized.

Isn't Gwen the most thoughtful person?