INS jokes
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
I have a dead fish in my lunchbox.
My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgeon coming in tomorrow. I'm super excited to work with him. The next day, we had to do our first-ever open heart surgery, so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient. We finished the surgery and went outside for a smoke, and we were talking. I said, "Why did you keep the patient's blood on your glove?"
He replied, "We in my free time I test it for anything diseases, HIV." The next day, I got invited to his house, and we had some drinks. I said, "This is amazing red tea. What is in it?" Just the 2000 people you have cut open.
Where's the best place to hide a body? In the second page of Google search results.
Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?
The black one... he's 13!
What do you call a priest that graduated from law school?
Father-in-law.
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat
There's no Asian kids in my class, but it just happens to be the rice store and the pet store just ran out of stock...
How many emos does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, because they just cry in the darkness.
What do you call a Muslim in a swimming pool? A bath bomb.
What do you call an Iraqi swimming in the water?
A bath bomb.
What do you call a Muslim sleepover?
Osamas in Pajamas.
What is the difference between a gay person and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t start moaning and groaning when you try to put the meat in.
Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today and treat others how you want to be treated!
Rate your day on a scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment [on] what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor tried to put her back in.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
What happened to people in Hiroshima and Nagasaki? They swapped races.
When was the biggest BBQ in history? Hiroshima, August 6, 1945.
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁