If jokes
If cops are called pigs, then security guards are piglets.
Stephen Hawking drove too far from the wall and unplugged.
He also forgot to pay the power bill.
If you replaced the boss in Portal with a boy, you would hear Stephen Hawking.
A man walks into a bar and sees a piece of steak on the ceiling.
The cashier says, "If you can grab it, your meal's free!"
The man then said, "Nah, the stakes are too high."
Everyone is talking about Head and Shoulders, and that if he never had a shower, his batteries would have got wet.
If you're having a bad day, just remember the Blobfish exists.
It's okay to tell a Stephen Hawking joke if there are stairs in your house he can't get to you. Plus, he shut himself down, so it's all good :)
What’s the difference between a 5.7l v8 and a dead baby?
If you lift the hood on my car, you won’t find a 5.7l v8.
I asked my friend if they wanted to hear a joke about sodium, and they said, "Na."
If you're Canadian in the kitchen, then what are you in the bathroom?
European.
If you got a crush and you are a 👧🏻 girl, let him lick 👅 your vagina.
Hey Gwen... I had a friend named Gwen in preschool.
The preschool was Cascade Christian and in Washington (which is close to Oregon. I read in a chat that you live there.) This is a long shot, but I think you might be the same Gwen. If not, ok.
Hi, I'm Claire. I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends," and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice, protective, single? If anyone has any more information about him, please tell me.
How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.
A man was almost about to drown. A boat said, "Do you need help?" And he said no.
After the boat left, another boat came to the sea, and they asked if he needed help, and he said no.
And he asked God, "Why didn't you help me?"
God said, "I sent you two big boats, you dummy!"
Like if you're gay.
I never feel offended if my friends don't wish me a happy birthday.
Because that's what I want.
I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, and they asked if I could pilot a plane.
Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.
And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like
An orphan is at a barbecue and is getting food. A man asks him if he wants steak or phan I ment ham.
If you’re bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?