Ice jokes
When it's cold outside, men can cut ice in three places.
What do superheroes put in their drinks?
Just ice.
Why can't I have any chocolate ice cream for dessert? Because I made it disappear up your ass for good.
The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.
School shootings are everywhere. In ice cream shops and even the woods.
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
Why did the grandpa leave the house to go to the grocery store?
To get the ice cream for the grandma.
"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret
"Why?" - Depressed boy
"Because he got ran over." - Margaret
"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy
Why did the North Tower want chocolate ice cream?
Because he didn't want plane.
Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.
Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"
What did the police say to the ice cream freezer?
What do you call a wizard who uses Ice Magic? A: A Blizzard!
Yo mama so fat, she the ice burg.
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
I sat down to eat some ice cream. The next moment, I screamed!
I left a chunk of ice outside during summer. That was the first time I heard icescream.
Why did the rapper go to the dentist?
To get his ICE checked.
What is Batman's favorite food?
Justice.
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!