Ice jokes
I left a chunk of ice outside during summer. That was the first time I heard icescream.
I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.
They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”
“Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
Memes
I had something about tripping over ice.
Well, it slipped my mind, so I'll just test some diamonds to see if they're ice.
Man 1: Knock knock.
Man 2: Who's there?
Man 1: Ice.
Man 2: Ice who?
Man 1: I crushed your head.
RTG iceberg?
It's ice to see you.
Why did the autistic ice cream run away from the party?
She had a meltdown.
Why was the rapper always cold?
Because he kept spitting ice!
I am not that good at making ice jokes, but it will suffice.
Why did the boy not cross the road?
Because he was on thin ice.
How do you find a rapper in a snowstorm?
Look for the one with the "ICE-COLD RHYMES."
Harder than a diamond in an ice storm.
How do rappers stay cool?
They use RAP-SICLES.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They wear their ice chains.
What do you call a Titan who can't swim?
Titanic!
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp. It would be unthinkable. My version is imagine the Titanic with a lisp, it would be unsinkable.
What did the front half of the Titanic say to the other half when it hit the iceberg? I'm breaking up with you.
What flavor ice cream do rape victims enjoy?
Cock flavor.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.