I like my jokes

I like my wife like I like my coffee: so sweet, it gives me headaches.

Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.

Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(

I like my coffee black. Just like my soul.

I like my women thick, so if they aren't over 375 pounds, they're not stepping into my room.

I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.

I like my women like my coffee—ground up and frozen.

What did Trump say to Epstein? "I like my tea like I like my teens: warm, sweet, and freshly made."

I like my kids like I like my lamps.

Hung from the ceiling.

I like my women like I like my coffee: nice, fresh, and dead.

I like my clocks like I like people.

Under 12.

I like my girls like my file systems...

FAT and 16.

I like women how I like my hair dryer: locked in a closet most of the time and only being used to blow me dry.

I like my boo like I like my packages: straight out of the box.

I like my women like I like my microwaves.

Hot, ready to go when I am, and able to kill any baby I put in her.

I like my women how I like my fridge.

In the kitchen.

The people in the Democratic Party are how I like my coffee.

Black and bitter.

I like my men how I like my coffee...

WITHOUT A FUCKING VAGINA!

I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.

I like my coffee like I like my women.

Big tits.

You know, I like my girls how I like my 9/11: Two twins that go down easy.