Human jokes
What's the difference between a human and a tree?
A human can chop down a tree.
A tree can't chop down a human.
A man walks into a bar. The man says, "Why the human face?" It's not funny at all.
What do you call a not potty trained human?
Amber Heard.
Lucas is a baby, a little girl, ooo!
Orphans are humans like everyone else, so suck it up, rude jerks!
"Hey, kid, why are you so fat?"
"Why did you insult him? That's not nice."
"It won't matter, he's deaf."
You gonna poop someday.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What do you call a pizza?
Anthony Cahill's face!
Humans. We are the joke. Retards.
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
Ah, son of a bitch, I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?!
The truth: Breast feeding is like having long sex with your baby. God dammit, I hate the truth!
What is the difference between a human and a magic dog? What is a human.
What is the difference between a human and a bird?
A bird can fly and a human cannot fly.
Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?
Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.
Me: Oh, okay.
Goes to school.
Teacher: How were humans made?
Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.
Teacher: 😑
What did the turtle tell the man? To keep being 5G7T4IPK24O[\]TWERGWREWGRGR.
I saw a little kid crying because he was lost. I asked him, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working in an orphanage!
Why did the mailman die?
'Cause everyone dies.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, either. It depends on how hard you throw them.
What do you call a dead human?
A DEAD HUMAN! HAHAHahahah ha.. ha.. ha Am I the only one laughing?