Human jokes
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.
Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.
My sister Wani is a dwarf, so I sit on her as a chair.
What do you call New York City?
A human zoo.
Yo mama's so fat that Jane Goodall couldn't tell if she was a chimpanzee or a human being.
What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant lady?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
How does a cannibal like his meat?
Human.
Why did the butt let out a fart?
Answer: To wipe out humanity!
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
I wrote a few jokes:
What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.
Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.
What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.
The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."
What has four legs and one arm? A Doderman in a playground.
What do humans and monkeys have in common? They both hang from trees.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
"Hey, kid, why are you so fat?"
"Why did you insult him? That's not nice."
"It won't matter, he's deaf."
I'm a human.
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
What was George's last message to humanity before joining the others?
"I CAN'T BREATHE!"
There are two doors leading to Heaven: one for henpecked husbands and one for unhenpecked husbands. The line to the door leading to Heaven for henpecked husbands was five abreast and five miles long. The line leading to the door to Heaven for unhenpecked husbands consisted of only one lonely man.
The guys from the henpecked husband line looked at the one man in the unhenpecked husband line and shout, “Hey, Charlie, why are you standing over there for?” Charlie glances over his shoulder and observes a sea of humanity of henpecked husbands as far as the eye can see and says grudgingly, “I don’t know. My wife told me to stand here.”