Hows jokes
They call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me poor and ugly.
How can you never find a hippo hiding behind a weed?
Because they're so good at it.
A man dies of old age on his 25th birthday. How is this possible?
Answer: He was born on February 29.
How fast does 173 move?
Breakneck speeds!
No matter how hard I try, I will never be a stand-up comedian.
Peter Griffin's chin.
Should I mention how much it looks like a penis?
How does a rapper stay warm in the winter?
With some HOT TRACKS!
In Junior High, we had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood the report and wrote about how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
How do you measure a dog's temperature?
In barking grade!
How did the gay man die? Homicide.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to pull a permit, one to schedule the inspector, and one to change the bulb.
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
Hi Explain Bear, how are youuu!
How do you cause an African parade?
You just carry a water bottle around and hold it up!
How does a rapper clean their house?
With a BEAT BRUSH!
How did the orphan lose its parents?
Its parents never came back from getting milk.
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
How did Jenson lose against a Cheetah?
Because he was a cheetah!
How do rappers greet each other?
With a high five and a mic drop!
How did they know the teacher onboard the spaceship had dandruff?
Cause her Head and Shoulders were everywhere!