I asked my mum why she’s depressed, she said her life has been a wreck? I asked how long has it been, she then asked when I was born
Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, "Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!" Maria replied, "See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!"
How do you make 7 an even number? Take the s out!
A pedophile is chatting on the internet : "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
How do you get a man with only one arm out of a tree?
Wave.
How are orphans and blind kids similar?
They both have never seen their parents :)
Do you want to know how to make s Smurf? CHOKE A MIDGET!
"How is your long distance relationship going?" -- "So far, so good."
How do computers get drunk
They take a screenshot
How many black people does it take to start a protest? -1
So I had a friend who was an orphan and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.
How did a blonde commit suicide
She jumped from the basement window
How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man that is homophobic into giving him a brojob? the gay man puts mustard on his dick and then puts his dick inside a glory hole
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID. Son (in a happy tone): I know. Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad? Son: Well yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
How is the business in Ukraine? It's booming.
If someone calls you, reply with this “Hi this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?
How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled? The wheelchair floats to the top
JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.
How do you make it hard for a rapist who is trying rape you? Rub it
