Hows jokes
"Know, know how there."
"Lesh, lesh how can you at lesh remember my name?"
How do you get a woman to give head? Force it down her throat and hold the back of her head. Make her gag for a little and then pull out. Do this over and over for 30 seconds or so. If she doesn't open up, choke her and force her mouth open.
Woman aren't human anyways... lol.
Q: How do you catch a squirrel?
A: Act like a nut.
(Psst! Heard this joke before? Sorry! That's the only nut-and-squirrel joke I know.)
How do you get an orphan's hands to bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home!
"Ethan is gay," you say that, but first, who asked? And second, where's your mum at? Correction, where's your family, so how dare you? Now in the comments say sorry, or I'm coming for you! 😡😡😜😝
How did the carpenter do on his interview? He nailed it!
How many bisexuals does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends, are you AC or DC? However many turn you on.
How tall does the grass grow in Germany?
Zis high!
You know how people say white men can’t jump? Well, you should check the 9/11 footage.
How sexy is Ariana Grande?
A man is talking to his doctor after undergoing a whole range of tests to try and find out what’s wrong with him.
The doctor sits him down and says, “I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but the results are back, and I’m afraid it’s fatal.”
“Oh no!” exclaims the man, “How long do I have?”
“Ten,” says the doctor.
“What, years? Months?!”
“Nine...”
I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
You know how Joe Biden is happy?
When he is rubbing a little girls' shoulders and eating ice cream.
A note for my old English Teacher:
Mr. Colin, who loves making a din, He thinks everyone loves him, but little does he know, That's not what everyone shows, About his life he ploughs and ploughs, About his dog Bella and his relationship woes... Mr. Colin, we do not care, When you speak, our minds are not there, Your life you have unnecessarily shared, When we see you, our eyesight is impaired... Mr. Colin, rumbling about his exceptions, Just when someone puts something in the bin, Or chatters to someone, not even causing a din, But Mr. Colin, drinking too much gin, Will flail all his annoying attention on him, He'll push his limits, right to the rim...
And just how I love flan! Oh, he's finally gone!
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
How to be a hero.
1. Tie a noose in your front yard.
2. Find and capture a furry.
3. Hang that furry because they deserve it.
It’s easy as 1-2-3!
How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill?
She was too used to grabbing the tip.
A kid asks his father, "How long is our trip, Dad?"
The kid's father says, "Our trip is a Fortnite."
I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!