How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
Howe Jokes
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
How do orphans see their family?
By looking at the mirror.
Q: How do you fit 4 gay men on a bar stool?
A: Flip the chair upside down.
How do you turn a Chinese person into an American? Put a bag of ice on their eyes.
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
How to improve my beloved Penchester United in 5 easy steps:
1. Sell Casemeiro 🤑 2. Sell Pernandes 🤑 3. Sell Bencho 🤑 4. Sell Trashford 🤑 5. Terminate penaldo 🤑 6. Make Mctominay extend his deal 📝
These came down deep from my heart. Don’t let me down again, please.
How I Punch my Brother: Wooden Sword.
How he is telling Dad: Diamond Sword.
How hard my Dad is gonna punch me: Warden Punch.
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Man: How do you prepare your chicken?
Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had, I said, "Yes."
I like my orphans how I like my wine, locked in my basement for ten.
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his whopper.
So, one day a teacher asked, "How many of you have thought of committing suicide?" Half of the class raised their hand, but the teacher said, "Where are Jesse and John?"
Why can't orphans operate Apple devices?
Because they don't know how to use the home button.
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
If a man travels 14 miles to buy a loaf of bread, how long will it take for him to realise that living in the countryside is shit?
