Howe jokes

Rapper

How did the rapper find his missing phone?

He checked the track list.

Memes

Mime

How do you make a mime cry?

You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.

Blowjob

How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?

If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.

Nun

Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"

Me: "Nun."

Emo

How many emos does it take to fix a lightbulb?

None, because they just cry in the darkness.

Emo

How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.

Skin

"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."

Hook

Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?

A: You give them a Sandy Hook.

Family

"Ethan is gay," you say that, but first, who asked? And second, where's your mum at? Correction, where's your family, so how dare you? Now in the comments say sorry, or I'm coming for you! 😡😡😜😝

Orphan

How did the orphan lose its parents?

Its parents never came back from getting milk.

Death

How did Stephen Hawking die?

Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!

Adoption

Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"

Sleep

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...