Howe jokes

Q: What did one koala say to the other? A: How's it hanging? 😂

Women be like, "Porn is how we get money," then get angry when boys treat women like shit because they seen it on porn.

A mother and her 7 year old child are walking in the grocery store. The young boy then screams to a random woman “you're an ugly bitch.”

The mother grabs her son and says, “I’m so sorry, I must have told him a thousand of times to not judge people on how they look."

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Put him in the microwave until his bill Withers.

Two fish were in a tank. One turned to the other and asked: "Hey, how do you drive this thing?"

Q: How many dead babies does it take to paint the wall?

A: Depends how hard you throw them.

How do bees 🐝 get to school?

They ride the school buzz!

How do we know Stephen is dying in hell?

There’s a stairway to heaven.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll just arrest the bulb for being broke and beat the room for being dark.

How do you get a baby into a small bowl?

A blender.

How do you get it out? Tostito chips.

One day, little Johnny and little Susan were in bible class. Little Susan had been tired that day, so she kept falling asleep. The teacher said to little Susan, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a push pin, and she yelled, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher goes, "That's right, go back to bed." Then, the next thing the teacher asked was, "Who gave up their son for our sins?" Little Johnny poked her again, and she yelled, "God Almighty!" The teacher says, "That's right, go back to bed." The next question the teacher asked was, "What did Adam say to Eve after their 13th child?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt again. She yelled, "If you stick that thing in me again, I am going to break it in half and shove it up your own ass and see how you like it!"

Someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

How do you blindfold an Asian?

You use dental floss.

Papyrus: Well come to the underground.

Sans: How was your falls?

Papyrus: G-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out.

Sans: Give me your balls!

How does a penguin build a house?

Igloos it together.

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"

How am I an ableist? My ex-girlfriend was in a wheelchair, and we lived in the same old building with a broken elevator. I ended the relationship by moving to the 8th floor.

Why is "Frozen" a good movie for orphans?

Because they know how to "let it go" when their parents went.

How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"