Hes jokes
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
"Muffin Man, Muffin Man, he's gonna rape you in his van."
Sans: What is Todoroki's favorite coffee creamer?
Half n' Half hehe.
Papyrus: Sans! He's not even part of our fandom!!!
Sans: Bro don't get so HOT headed about it. Just CHILL.
Sorry not sorry -sans
There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!
Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he's a coward!
He's fat!
Hi, everyone. Serious question. Would it be illegal to decapitate a worm? Asking for a friend, he's so worried we're going to jail. I'm not. I'm fine. Please reply fast.
He's dead.
Teacher: *Reads mythological story about a cyclops*
Me: Does he have one eye cause he's from an incestual family in Alabama?
Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Well, pull yourself together, then.
Doctor, doctor! My brother's crazy! He thinks he's a chicken. Is he egging around? Yes, but we need to get the eggs.
Woman: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm an elephant! Doctor: Run around the room. Then the woman stomps around the room and breaks things.
Doctor, doctor! I fell like a bell! Shall I ring you, then? When can you ring me up?
Doctor, doctor! I have a ball stuck in my throat! Shall I bat it and get a run, then?
He's homeless.
Another: Oh he must be A "Sheer" (as in Andrew Scheer) survivor...
The other: No, he's a Liberal (as in Justin Trudeau) job hopeful.
Which president has never gone to jail?
Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?
Why couldn't the T-rex clap his hands?
Because he's dead.
Jake had sex and broke her hymen, guess he’s Jake the ripper.
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
When you go to your friend's house to fuck her brother, but realize he's your brother from your mom's side.
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
Why did Obama marry Michelle?
Because he's into chicks with dicks.