Herring jokes
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
Memes
when she says its her first time by u feel the presence of the past dihs inside her
Yo mama so fat her yearbook picture was a double-page spread.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
Joe Mama so weird, she cut her hair in a squiggly diggly haircut.
Your mama is so ugly, she summoned Bloody Mary.
She handed her an application through the mirror.
Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
Did you hear about the orphan that tried to high five a tree? It left her hanging.
Me: Yo mama so fat her alphabet starts with O.
My friend: What's that supposed to mean?
Me: O B C D.
My grandmother made her passage on the Titanic. The ship was not the only thing that went down.
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
Yo mama so fat, her belly enters the room 10 minutes before she does.
I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!
Me be like: ;-;
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.