I wondered why there was red all over my bathroom til I found out that my sis had dyed her hair red. Man, it looked like somebody died in there! Lol.
Herring Jokes
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
"Yo mama so fat when she got buried it took them all the trees on Earth for her coffin."
Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.
Yo mama so fat that when she went on the scale, it showed her phone number.
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?
There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.
Yo mama so ugly, we all are trying to help her look better.
Yo mama so dumb, when her computer was asking for cookies, she grabbed a cookie, smashed it onto the screen, and broke the computer.
"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
Why doesn't the witch wear panties?
To get a better grip on her broom stick!
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
I bought my sister a trampoline. She sat in her wheelchair and cried.
My girlfriend is so stupid, she asked me if I wanted to shower with her to save money on our water bill, while we were staying at a hotel where we didn't even have to pay the water bill.
