Herring Jokes

Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"

Yo mama's so fat, Darth Vader wanted her to be the Death Star!

Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?

Because she can listen to call music.

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.

“Come again!” says the woman behind the desk.

“No, it’s curry this time.”

What makes Mrs Grape 🍇 a good mother?

Raisin her kids

your mom so slow it took her 9 moths to create a joke

Yo mama so fat. Even dora couldn't explore her

What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents? Grounded beef.

your sister is so stupid she only thinks a onion will make people cry.

so i throw a coconut at her

your mums so fat i took a picture of her last christmas and its still printing

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes So she gave me a hug

Yo mama so ugly her self portraits hanged themselves

What's the difference between me and Elizabeth Afton?

Her dad always comes back.

My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.

A man walks into his bedroom where his wife is carrying a sheep under her arm and says, "This is the pig I've been fucking."

Wife says, "That's not a pig; that's a sheep, dumbass."

Husband says, "I was talking to the sheep."

My older sister said she was gonna shoot herself, so I did it for her.

"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."

How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."