Herring jokes

It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”

I guess you could say, “harassment something.”

Yo mama so fat, she uses the Gulf of Mexico as her hot tub!

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in them.

My mom once ate a full giant cheesecake, and we were walking to our flight back home, and she had to sh*t.

We were walking to the bathroom, and she full on [did it] in front of the carousel. She had a lump of poo in her pants... True story, haha!

Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"

Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?

Because she can listen to call music.

Yo mama is so fat that Naruto couldn't make enough shadow clones to surround her.

I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.

Yo mama's so fat, Darth Vader wanted her to be the Death Star!

Herpes? No, I don't want her. Her pees.

Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to smell her own nose.

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

Momma's so fat, she can use her belly button as a breakfast bowl.

I caught my wife this morning gazing at our marriage license of long ago that hangs upon our wall with tears in her eye!

Almost got teary eyed myself until she told me she was only looking for the expiration date!

My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. But, unfortunately, it just made her more upset.

She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”

Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]

Wayne Couzens, the police officer who killed Sarah Everard, has been complaining about receiving a whole life tariff for her murder...

I think he should count his blessings. He could have had it worse...

He could have married her!

Yo mama is so fat that when she is about to put her foot on the scale, the scale begs for mercy.

Yo mama so fat, when she falls, they have to call 999 and a crane to pick her up.

Your mama is so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirit.