Have jokes
Hi, I'm new here and I'm 11. I'm just bored and want a girlfriend.
Does anyone have Snapchat or Twitter? I can show you what I look like ;)
Humans and sharks have something in common: the great ones are always white.
Why are some girls scared easily?
They don't have balls.
VOTING QUARTERFINAL 4
LIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.
DISLIKE: When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”
Vote for the better joke. Semifinals are later or tomorrow.
I have a fish that can break dance. Only for about 20 seconds, and only once.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common?
Once they're gone, they never come back.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
What do a pimp and a farmer have in common?
They both need a hoe to stay in business.
An orphan walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Buddy, you have to go home." The orphan replies, "Where is home?"
The orphan: why don't my parents love me? Me: because you don't have any.
If you're going to be a smart ass, you have to be smart, or you're just an ass.
You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush.
All I have to do is go to the Africa section.
Have you ever eaten African food?
A husband walks into the bedroom door holding two aspirin and a glass of water.
His wife asked what that was for.
"It is for your headache."
"I don't have a headache."
He smiles. "Gotcha!!!!"
Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.
A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...
Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???
Child: Both.
Why do Christmas trees like wheelchairs? Because they have kids.
I’m going to be busy having dinner soon. I have internet for Christmas 🎄 and I have some Christmas.
Can [I] ask your sister how you are going for Christmas? And [to clarify,] I have internet.