Hate jokes
If R. Kelly was a therapist:
14 year old: I hate my life.
R. Kelly: I feel you.
I hate when people make 9/11 jokes, I'm just blown away.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange who?
Orange glad I didn’t say banana. Hahaha, you’re right, I hate that guy!
Why do orphans hate Fridays?
Family movie night.
Why do orphans hate playing sports in school?
Because they never get picked.
Why do orphans hate cricket?
Because they can't get a "homerun."
Why do orphans hate school? Because of homework.
Why does an orphan hate the internet?
Because he's always on the homepage.
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.
I used to hate facial hair,
but then it grew on me.
Ugh... I hate Anons so much, they're annoying as fuck.
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence."
Why do orphans hate Costco? Because they can't get in and try the free samples.
I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."
I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.
Welcome for the rhyme.
Son: Hey, Dad, I'm cold. Can you give me a lift from work?
Dad: Hi Cold, nice to meet you. Sorry, I don't pick up strangers.
Son: I hate you!
I hate you—if you look at the first letters of the words, you'll know what I mean.
Interfischl
Happy
Apple
Tea
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
Thumb nails.
Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...