Hate jokes
What kind of number hates nuts?
17.
What do sheep hate?
Their enemies: goats!
Roses are blue, violets are blue.
What? Ohh, shit!!!!!! I hate having dyslexia!
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.
It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.
Q. Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
A. Because they hate the taste of their stupid clown wigs, makeup, and retarded shoes.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange who?
Orange glad I didn’t say banana. Hahaha, you’re right, I hate that guy!
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
Maude of ghostposter is a dumb Christian pussy-ass bitch. She's so fucking squeamish it's hilarious, although I hate her.
Student: Why does everyone hate me?
Another student: Because U got the A last night.
So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, "my buns are burning."
I hate it when ever I bring a girl over, my parents don't care, but when I bring one of my friends that's a boy, they're like, "Keep the door open," and I'm gay.
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because I have short hair. I mean, I'm gay, what do you expect?
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
Why doesn't my egg want to crack?
Because I hate my egg-sistence.
A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing.
Man: "Ah, suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump?" Lady: "Yep. I hate this world." Man: "Well, if you're gonna die, can we have sex before you jump?" Lady: "Hell no! You creep!" Man: "Ok, fine. I guess I'll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore."
I hate this website. It's retarded and 4chan is better.
Sans: Why couldn't the skeleton go to prom?
Papyrus: Why? AND YOU KNOW I HATE PUNS!
Sans: Because they had NO BODY to go with.
Papyrus: THAT IS ENOUGH!!!
Sans: Sorry, didn't mean to GET UNDER YOUR SKIN.
Papyrus: YOU HAVE MADE ME MAD TO THE BONE SANS......wait
Sans: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What's dumb?
The Fetus Deletus joke!
Fucking hate that joke....
Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."
Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."
Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."
Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."