when i shit in the toliet i think that if shit hard anuff I can see my asshole plug.
Ok One time I there was my dog But then the dog It fell
Then I fckd my dog hard in the a$$
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys. Thank you Jesus for creating baptism.
What's thick, long, hard and has cum in it?
Cucumber. Lol. I love the way you think.
I'm hard right now
Cause your a DICKstraction
;) - SEO-YUN
Before Marriage Boy:At last, I can hardly wait! Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even thing about it! Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of course, always! Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: No, why are you asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get! Girl: Will you slap me? Boy: Hell nah, you crazy!! Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yeah girl! Girl: Oh Honeyyy😍 After Marriage Now, read that from the bottom to the top.
Life's like a dick. Women make it hard for no reason
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
This days dating life is hard, you put your self out there and its hard to find someone, the only thing to do is turn to family
Gutted rn...the girl I loved hard just got in a relationship. She liked me too so I missed the chance. Idk if she still does...man...
Biden: Shut up Trump, DISRESPECTFUL) President: you are the one with the inappropriate hair touching bro.😎😎😎😎😎😎 Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.
There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed and they all went to heaven. God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said,"I want to be handsome. " God granted his wish. The second guy said,"I want to be more handsome than the first guy.", God granted his wish. "The third guy said " I want to be more handsome than the second guy." God granted his wish and this continued on and on until the 15 ugly guy.The ugly guy was laughing. Really hard. "What is your wish?" God asked him. "I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!!!" God granted his wish
Someone kills a emotionally weak person by hard words and bullying. No one will suspect the killer was, anyone who took part.
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He B*NED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
It ain't always having erectile dysfunction but it sure as hell ain't hard
How do you make Olaf hard You tickle his snow balls
i tried to play with Rock but it was hard
Two boys are wandering in the woods, playing games. Suddenly they come across a naked lady, and one of the boys starts running, the other chases after him and asks: "Why did you start running?". The boy replies with: "My mom said if I ever see a naked lady, then I would turn to stone. And I can already feel a part of me turning hard."
