Guy jokes
When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"
Jesus seemed like he was probably a good guy; healed the sick, fed the hungry, and gave good advice.
Jesus had only one flaw: he was always hanging around.
In response to a buddy saying they joined a golf club:
"Jfc, you’ve gone softer than your old man’s dick after your mom suggests a romantic night in! I swear to God you’re so fucking bougie."
(Pause)
"Oh, I forgot to tell you, while you were gone I got a weird call for you... Some Jeff guy? Said something about a loan..."
"Jeff who?"
"Bezos."
HEY! You guys need to S T O P making Stephen Hawking jokes. He has done so much for the theoretical physics world, and THIS is how you choose to repay him? All 653 of you should be ashamed of yourselves.
So I'm the cable guy around the neighborhood, and I do everybody's cable. So I walked into this one house, and I noticed a little kid and the mom was upstairs. I was asking where her mom was, and she wasn't answering, and it looked like something was wrong, so I asked if anything was wrong. She didn't answer, so I kind of raised my voice at her, but she still didn't answer, and then I realized the hearing aid in her ear.
There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to bury them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but the second guy refuses the meal.
When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.
In heaven, an angel asks him why.
“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat, though.”
WTF is wrong with you guys? This is bullying. Stop it, please, but Shaenaya sounds like a good name.
Suck my ass, guys!
I’m am very sad that you guys are making fun of adopted kids because I am adopted :( :( 😢 🥺 😢 😭😭
Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?
Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈
This Anonymous guy is acting like Hitler, bro.
This black dude goes up to an Indian guy and says, "What up brotha?"
The Indian guy gets offended and says, "We are not the same."
The black guy then pulls out a gun, and the Indian guy says, "Ok brother, ok brother, we are the same, we are the same."
Do the voice in your head.
There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.
Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...
The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.
Three guys walk into a bar; the fourth one ducks.
I was watching a TV show where a guy was hanging off a cliff, then the series ended... I guess you can say that they left that guy on a cliffhanger!
A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.
He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
At work: Hey guys, I'm gonna Arnold clock out now.
Sike, I lied, your mom is a guy!
Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?
Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.
Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.