How does a cannibal start a wedding reception?
He toasts the groom.
Grooming Jokes
Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.
Why do bees have sticky hair? They always use honeycombs.
A pedophile is chatting on the internet: "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?
Kinder
What do bees brush their hair with?
A honeycomb.
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.
Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?
I groomed 2 minors today.
Where did the sheep get a haircut?
At the baa-baa shop.
I like my lovers like I like my whiskey, 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
I hooked up with the groom at my uncle's wedding.
A pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, "hey little boy, if I give you a lolly, will you come in my car?" Little Jonny replies, "Give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth."
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣
Sir, I mustache you a question...
Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Wow, hairy!"