Greeting jokes

It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.

Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.

A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...

Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???

Child: Both.

Hi, I love you. You know I do. What a good night of a good time and time to go, oooo!

Hi guys, I just found this website. I got emailed by joshisboss or something. Have a great day! 👍

I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"

Me holding a new cat: Say hi to my little friend!

My friends: Hi to my little friend!

How do two emo kids greet each other?

"I like ya cut, G."

A friend texts to another:

"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"

The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"

To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Fuck.

Fuck who?

Fuck off!

Hi 👋

How do poets say hello?

Hey, haven’t we metaphor?

Hi, my name is Jeff.

What did the cow say to your mom?

Hello.

Son: Hi.

Dad: Yo.

So my ex invited me to dinner with her new boyfriend.

Her boyfriend said "Hi."

I said, "Knife to meet you!"

Hi, I'm cool.

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Bone."

"Bone who?"

"It's nice to meet cha'. Can we be friends? I'm bone-ly here."

Good afternoon. My name is Russell, and I am a wilderness explorer of Tribe 54, Sweat Lodge 12. Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?

What did the sushi say to the bee?

Wa sa Bee.

Hello explain bear my love 💕💕