Girls jokes

I was looking forward to my date with this paraplegic girl, but she stood me up.

What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?

- A smartphone, freak.

Two blonde girls find a beautiful Christmas tree in the woods.

After two hours, someone said, "We found a tree without bark!"

I went to help an amputated girl, but she didn't have a hand for me to grab.

14 girls asked me to go out today!

I was in the ladies' toilets...

Girl: "Dad."

Dad: "Do I love you?"

Girl: "I am a prostitute."

Dad: "Yes."

Woman 2: "Dad."

Dad: "Right?"

Woman 2: "I'm a woman too."

Father: "God, do you love children?"

Boy: "Yes..."

My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."

Explain Bear, girl, you're tripping.

Why do girls only stay in odd groups of friends?

Because they literally can't even.

The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.

I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.

NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.

MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.

Guy and Girl are in the shower talking to each other.

Guy: Let's drop the soap.

Girl: Let's do it!

How do the Powerpuff Girls vape?

They take a "power puff."

Not a joke.

Any girls looking for a steamy hot man?

A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"

What did the plane that crashed on the ground say? Let me crash between those legs, girl!

Sorry, cringy joke.

What is a popular name for girl peanuts?

Michelle.

A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."

What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.

What’s a 5 letter word that starts with a ‘P’ that girls love to get their hands on? 😏