When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen
and then you remember you’re french
Words that have "ho" in them:
Thot
Whore
Asshole
Horrible
Horena (my ex gf)
my gfs pregers im 13 she was raped
A hobo couple is making out under a bridge. The gf goes - Johnny, why your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!
Bully: How’s ur gf? Kid: I don’t have one how’s your parents? Bully: *crys* Kid: *Walks out orphanage
I heard my neighbours having sex and it was annoying me, so I called my gf to ask if she wanted to go out but when I called her I heard my neighbours phone ringing
ex-bf's gf: your so ugly as hell me: oh did I mention that i was trying to be you
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?
Oh wait, I am because she's 10.
Katgod, can you get your girlfriend? She's messing with me, and I'm gonna hurt soon.
I told my emo girlfriend, "Do you like the lights?" Oh wait, she ain't got any.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."
A guy start texting a Cute girl and ask to give her phone no. So he can't call her the girl ok but you have to transfer mobile balance to my number then I am gonna be your gf and will meet you somewhere the transfer her the balance and called her but turn out the girl was actually a guy making him fool he blocked him. Next day he was very angry about himself being fool so thought he gonna do the same he make a fake girl account and start texting with some random guy and then he ask that guy to send him balance. Suddenly his father came in his bedroom and ask " son can you send me some balance i am gonna send you can after sometime" that guy look at his father with suspicious eyes and then he call that random number suddenly his father phone start ringing......
Why cant orphans have a gf?
They have no one to call daddy
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
I had sex with my German girlfriend; it was kinda weird though. She kept yelling her age. I don't know why.
mom:son did u go to school son:whit if i saw yes mom:u r in school slap son:mom am moveing out and am moveingin whit my gf mom:u r whit pls dont move out =( son:mom stop so whit if am moveing out am moveing into my gf home it oley for school mom:will u r kick out of my home son:good mom:am sad now why did he move out
if u like it pls comit down
im 14 i have had sex before, I have 206 bones in my body but when im with my gf i have 207
Son: Dad, can I get a girlfriend?
Dad: Son, no, you are only 10, so no.
Son: Dad, I'm leaving to get a girlfriend.
Dad: Son, nooo, you are not my son!
Son: What did you say? *Son slaps the dad.*
Dad: Good, son, goodbye, get out of my home.
Son: Good, you can go move to a new home.
