Get jokes

If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan in the face. What's he going to do? Tell his parents?

How do you get ten babies in a bowl?

A blender.

How do you get them out?

Doritos.

Why did the child cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?

Noise!

What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?

A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.

What name do you get if you mix the names Chris and Marisa?

Then you get the name Chrisa.

How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?

You can't get either one at home.

If I get an atom, I would split it with you.

For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.

In life you either yeet or get yeeted, or you beat or get beaten.

I guess I failed.

A twin engine has two engines.

If one engine stops, the other will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.

Why don't nurses like giving old people baths or showers?

Because they don't want their vegetables to get soggy.

Q: What do men and math tests have in common?

A: They get cheated on.

How do you get "Dick" from Richard?

Ask him nicely.

What's the different when a little boy drops in Japan then and now?

When a little boy falls today he gets back up. But then everyone fell and never came back up.

Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!

Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?

Dog toys are getting out of control.

My mum's dog has a round bison bone.

Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.

Is it so? Do people get freedom?

Omega was born with Mammosbum in Mammam.

Humor is like food, not everybody gets it.