Get jokes
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?
They never get old.
Dark jokes are just like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Do you know what a reverse exorcism is?
It's when the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
My favorite bartender serves drinks so strong, he gives a "get well soon" card with each one of them!
The difference between an apple and an orphan is that the apple gets picked.
I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
Why do orphans get in trouble at school?
Because the school doesn't have any parents to report to.
I ask the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
Why do emo kids not get phones? Because the phone dies before them.
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
Why did he go to the chiropractors?
To get his spine fixed.
Are you a train because I want to get railed by you? ;)