Get jokes
Why did I have to pay $300 on Uber?
I had to get from your forehead to your big ass nose.
What do you get when you cross A-Rod with Chris Brown?
Cheater, cheater, woman beater!
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
Why do people hate math? They always get hungry while learning about the pie chart.
How do u get 40 cigarettes in a pack?
U shove them down his throat. 🤣😂
How it feels To gas the other players and get in second from missing your aim.
Named my dog Syndrome, so when he sits on my couch I can say, “Get down, Syndrome!”
Time for a story: There are 500 bricks on a plane, one falls off. How many are left? 499.
What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator? Open fridge, put in elephant, close fridge.
What are the 4 steps to putting a giraffe in a fridge? Open fridge, take out elephant, put in giraffe, close fridge.
The lion king is having a birthday party. All the animals attend except one, who is it? Giraffe, he's stuck in the fridge.
Sally wants to cross an alligator infested river. There is no bridge and the only way she can get across is by swimming. She swims across safely, how? The alligators where at the birthday party.
Sally dies anyway. How? She got hit in the head by a flying brick.
If you're pro-life, I hope you get hit by a bus today!
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
So, Little Johnny comes home from school knowing damn well he messed up his math test. His mother and father get home and he tells them, "Mom, I failed my math test." His mother aggressively says, "Get the belt!" Johnny says, "Why?" His mother says, "I'm gonna spank you for failing!" Johnny says, "So just like daddy?" His father turns red knowing what they did last night.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Cos every time they get a corner, they open a shop.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Dark humor is like water: some people get it, and some people don't.
Why didn't the octopus get a tent? Because it had tentacles.
Where did Josh go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
Dark humor is like pussy: whining bitches don't get it.
Why didn't Steven Hawkins get into fights?
'Cause he couldn't stand up for himself.
You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.