Get jokes
Why do orphans go to church?
Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
They were always saying "Bach, Bach, Bach". And his cows preferred Moo-zak.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Dress up as the altar boy.
Why did Oliver have no friends?
His last name was Clothesoff, and all the other kids would get in trouble whenever they would ask to play with Oliver Clothesoff.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get hit by a bus.
What did the woman say when I told a rape joke?
"I don't get it."
Want to know the difference between an orphan and a flower??
Flowers get picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?
It never gets old.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the barking lot.
What do you call someone who gets killed at 12 o'clock on New Year's? First kill of the match.
Dark humor is like food:
Not everyone gets it.
Or a kid with cancer, it never gets old.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Fuck her hahaha 🤣
(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!
What do orphans get at restaurants?
The family meal.
I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:
P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.
Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.
“They are all very tearable,” he replied.
Well, there is one person who gets it!
Why did your emo mom get you?
To have someone to hang out with.
My 14 year old daughter went shopping at a grocery story.
She gets to the register and she asked the cashier to scan her scarred wrist.
The cashier scanned it and replied with, "Ma'am this item is worthless."
What do you get when you mix Harry Houdini, a basketball, and the 17th president?
Magic Johnson.
I really want to beat the living daylights out of you, but it's not worth getting the wooden spoon for garbage.