Gender Role jokes
Q: How many men does it take to open up a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in.
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
Women be like men should pay for first dates, then get mad when you do...
Why are modern women trash?
Because back in the day, a woman knew her place.
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
I was in class and we had to choose another term for words we use everyday. For kid, I chose "child"; for dog, I chose "pet"; and for wife, I chose "dishwasher."
There are women's support groups, but where are men's support groups?
Why does the queen move more than a king on the chessboard?
Because it looks like a kitchen floor.
Wife: (on phone) Hi. Husband: Hey, I didn’t know dishwashers talk and make me a sandwich.
Pro marriage tip: Let your wife know you’re all about women’s rights, especially the right to remain silent, because all appliances should be silent.
How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
What’s the difference between a job and a wife?
The job keeps sucking after 5 years.
The real reason women are always cold is because they’re not in front of a stove or an oven. So, naturally, when they leave the habitat, they need to have two blankets.
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
History is mostly just a list of things men did while women were busy making sure they didn't die of scurvy.
My girlfriend didn't bring me the sandwich, so I brought the gas.
How many genders are there?
One, women are property.