My kitchen was rearranged today. The tables have turned, and the steaks are higher.
How many screws does it take to construct a lesbian's bed?
None, it's all tongue and groove...
What do you call a chair?
I don't know. What?
Oh, hi, Chairity!
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
By rearranging the furniture.
Your mom walked into a bar and broke all the furniture.
Do gay midgets come out of the cabinet?
What's a chairs favorite snack?
Chair-es or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
I slept like a log last night... woke up in the fireplace.
Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?
A: A couch potato. HaHaHa
A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?
On the COWch (couch).
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
What does a human and a cat have in common, both takes my bed
Some moving men had just begun their days work. The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch. The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."
How many gay guys can you fit on a barstool? 4... if you turn it upside down.
I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.
What do chairs spend on the most?
Chair-ity.
What's the difference between a man and a table?
The table doesn't cry when I break its legs.
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"
Helen Keller walked into a bar.
Then a table.
Then a chair.
