Fucking

Fucking jokes

Dwarf

    • Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next-door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift, but he told me to “fuck off.” In the end, I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.

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    • Life

    • I heard life was a gift. Well, I hope they kept the receipt, because I'd like a mother-fucking refund!

    Fucking memes

    Hooker

    • A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.

    "Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"

    "Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."

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    • Penguin

    • A man runs into a church and shouts, "Are there any dwarf nuns in the monastery?" The Pope said no, causing the man to say to his friend, "I told you you fucked a penguin!"

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    • Gun

    • The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

    He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.

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    • Kid

    • I was driving when I saw a kid chasing after a ball, but I didn’t have enough time to slow down. Then I pulled over, and the dad yelled, "What the fuck did you do?" I looked into the street and saw the ball completely deflated and the kid crying, "Now I gotta hear him bitch and moan all day," he continues.

    Anal Sex

    • My girlfriend asked me if we could have anal sex, and I said, "What's that?" She said, "I fuck her ass." I said, "Oh, my uncle calls that shhhhh."

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    • Anniversary

    • I'm 43 and my date is 19. A man rudely comes up to our table and calls me a pedophile. I told him to fuck off, this is our 10th anniversary.

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