Fruit

Fruit jokes

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?... one gets picked.

Orphan

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Hand

If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?

Big hands.

Wheelchair

How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?

It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.

Memes

Fruit memes

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?

Apples get picked.

Orphan

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Worm

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding only half a worm.

Man

Three men were captured by a tribe and tortured. The leader of the tribe tells them that they would live only if they could achieve one thing: They had to go out and find 10 pieces of the same fruit each.

The first person returned with apples. The leader said that he had to put all 10 of them up into his ass without making a sound, or he would be killed. 1... 2... he screamed.

The next person came back with grapes. 1, 2, 3, he counted up to 8, but began to burst out laughing; he was killed. In heaven, the first man asked him why he laughed if he was doing so well. "Well, I saw the third guy coming back with fucking pineapples!"

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    • Witch

    What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.

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    • Wheelchair

    Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.

    Apple

    TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?

    My cousin: the other half.

    Orphan

    What is the difference between apples and orphans?

    The apples get picked.

    Trash Can

    Why aren't apple chargers called apple juice? Also, how do you throw away trash cans?

    Orphan

    What is the similarity between orphans and apples?

    They both get thrown out.