Fruit jokes
Why did the strawberry 🍓 go out with a banana? Because it could not find a date.
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
Why'd the orange lose the race?
Because it ran out of juice.
What do you call a homosexual in a coma?
A fruit and a vegetable!
Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
A: One of them gets picked.
Thats a sussy Strawberry
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple actually gets picked.
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
What do you call a banana that can dance?
CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS [sic]
What is an emo's least favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
Why do orphans like apples? Because they get picked.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana?
Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.
Why did the orange stop?
Because it ran out of juice. Hahhaha.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple's actually get picked.
Pineapple turnover.
Here in Canada, you used to be able to be shipped off to an asylum just because you were gay.
I guess they couldn't tell the fruits from the nuts.
I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.
Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."
I find bananas very appeeling.
Why did the homophobic boy get fired from the banana factory?
He kept throwing away the bent ones!