Fruit jokes
When life gives you lemons... call them yellow oranges and sell 'em for double the price!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are picked.
Why do orphans pick apples? Because that's the only thing they can pick.
What do rappers like cantaloupe?
Because they’re always dropping fresh MELON!
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
What does an apple and an orphan have in common?
One gets picked.
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be water melon.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
What do apples and emos have in common?
They both hang from trees.
Tyler: What's your favorite fruit?
Frankie: Pineapple duh, what's yours?
Tyler: Pineapple
Frankie: Wanna come over and watch some Netflix? I'm home alone.
Tyler: Absolutely!! What time should I be there?
Frankie: Right now.
Tyler: Sweet! Should I bring a condom?
Frankie: Now enough talk, let's fuck.
Tyler: I thought you never asked.
What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
Din mor ligner en banan. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
What do you call a fish with no tail? A one-eyed grape.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked. 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Did you hear about the race of the tomato and lettuce? Well, the lettuce was winning and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked.
How do butts communicate?
By using CRACK-BERRIES!