Fruit jokes
My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.
My girlfriend broke up with me because she caught me eating a banana with my butt........
IMAGINE!
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like an apple.
How do you make an apple turnover?
You push it down a hill.
Why'd Billy get fired from the banana factory?
He kept throwing with the bent one.
Gay gang members don't do drive-bys, they do fruit roll-ups.
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What is the cherry's favorite cartoon?
"Tom and Jerry!"
What’s the most artistic fruit?
Vincent mango.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What is the difference between an apple spread and an orphan spread?
Apples get picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked, and the other doesn't.
If an apple and an emo kid fell out of a tree, which would hit the ground first?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?
A sourpuss.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
"Breathe... Breathe..."
Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.
What is a superhero’s 🦸♀️ favorite drink?
Fruit punch!
Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin off and eat them, they die.
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.