Friendship jokes

So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.

Why can't an orphan be friends with Dom Toretto?

Dom doesn't have friends; he has "family."

"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"

"He died."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."

(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"

Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.

Is your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go wayyyy back?

A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."

TJ's hairline is so far back his friends don't even want to talk to his ugly ass!

My friend told me an EMO joke once, and I said, "EMO jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"

Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"

Brayden: "Hey!"

*Music roles around*

*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*

Brayden: "O_O"

Hailey: *Hides*

So sad </3 xD

To Tina: Hi, love, you're my oldest and dearest friend. I will love you for as long as I live. I luvv you so much, my sweetest, dearest darling.

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!

Neona (😞): Are you mad at me?

Gwen (😌): Me? NEVER! Sometimes we listen and don't listen, let's just hug it out!

Neona (😁): Agreed!

My mates threw nuts at the wall, now we call them walnuts.

Hahaha :)

Me and the boys are cool.

Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he's a pain in the neck.

What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?

Getting them to come out of their shell.

Who was Goldilocks' best friend?

Goldie.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In every step you take, My support stays true.

Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?

How can you tell your best friend is gay?

His meat tastes like shit.