Friendship jokes
Your hair and your hairline must be best friends, 'cause they go waaaaay back!
I knew a guy who would always claim he had a buddy with an IQ of 1.
It turns out he was just looking in the mirror.
Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.
Man's friend: Same.
Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.
Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.
Man: Oh great heavens!
Your forehead and your hairline must be friends, because they go way back!
My friend told me an EMO joke once, and I said, "EMO jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
What did the calculator say to his friends? “You can count on me!”
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?
How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood?
His hand caught on fire.
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
Should I kill the main character's best friends in my book? It's an autobiography.
TJ's hairline is so far back his friends don't even want to talk to his ugly ass!
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
Is your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go wayyyy back?
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
I told my friend to look at the clock, then I said, "Is this a bad time?"
How do you get a squirrel to be your friend?
Act like a nut.
Beans for centuries have been called "false friends," because they have a tendency to talk behind one's back. If you get my drift. 🤣
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"