Friendship Jokes

why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?"

Watson pondered for a minute.

"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." "Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo." "Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell you, Holmes?"

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"

What do you call it when a person with downsyndrome gets friendzoned?

Chromozoned

WHEN YOU FEEL LONELY JUST WATCH A SCARY MOVIE.

YOU WONT FEEL LONELY ANYMORE:(

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

like if your bestfreind is emo

I can’t hang out with a emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply

When the school shooter finds you and you think you’re gonna die but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌

Me: *Meets girl, starts to form crush* Me after I get enough courage to talk to her: “Are you a casket lid because I want you on top of me*

“What do you call my friend group?* *Suicide Squad*

Like this if you laughed.

These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.

I made a website for orphans .Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.

Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.

Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father

Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)

Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.

What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.

Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!

i just wanted to say to never let go of family they are everything never let anyone walk all over you and if you are with me like this quote

Like if your bestfriend has a dog

A couple is sitting down, holding hands, and having a picnic after their wedding when the husband's friend walks over and says,

"Jenny and Jonathan sittin in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, the comes abrupt, tragic miscarriage! Then comes blame. Then comes despair, two hearts damaged, beyond repair. Johnathan leaves Jenny, and writes on the tree: D-I-V-O-R-C-E."

i got in trouble in school for leaving the depressed kid hanging

Me: I got kicked out of the library the other day Friend: why? Me: because i put the women rights book in the fiction section

Fatty told Skinyy "Do you have any food my stomach is empty and I haven't eaten" Skinny replied to Fatty "Well doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead"

when someone says to cheer up: you, I never thought of that. :) -> in reality, :( (sob)

depression is no game and here in this world we are here for each other although at times it might not seem like it. keep strong and you'll find the end of the tunnel but ending the pain and bieng gone just spreads depression.

my best friend got ligma (ah did he, sorry bro) LIGMA BALLS

Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, "okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "what?" As he looked over at Jim.