Friends jokes
Is your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go wayyyy back?
Me: Y’all should start calling me 1943.
Friend: Why?
Me: 'Cause I’m going through my own Great Depression.
Friend 1: Did you?
Depressed friend 2: I didn't!
Friend one: Swear on your life!
Depressed friend 2: I swear.
A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.
When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.
Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3
What do guns and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
My friend told me an EMO joke once, and I said, "EMO jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
Food makers are proudly presenting human flesh-made foods. Donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives.
T and C apply. This is only in the best shops in your town, or down the road, or in your country. 1 like = 1 family member donated 'cause we're saving lives😎😎
My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.
It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.
Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.
His parents weren't too happy.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
Why is jelly laughing a lot?
Because his friend goes nuts!
What do you call my friends?...
Short.
My friend said that gay people existed 10 years ago.
He can tell the future.
Man: Aw man, I'm having a bad day.
Man's friend: Same.
Man: So why did you have a bad day? My brother got hit by the school bus.
Man's friend: I got fired as a bus driver.
Man: Oh great heavens!
What does an emo kid say to his best friend?
"Let's hang out."
My friend went to buy some milk, why is she not back yet?
My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
Asking for a friend, could anyone please tell me how to politely ask a question for a friend?
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.