Friends jokes
Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?”
“No,” said his mom, “Of course not.”
Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, “It’s okay! We can play that game!”
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
TJ's hairline is so far back, his friends don't even want to talk to him.
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
Depresso Exspresso let's be friends, please.
During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.
He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.
Me: What’s the definition of “ignorance”?
Friend: Don’t know?
Me: U STUPID!
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
Beans for centuries have been called "false friends," because they have a tendency to talk behind one's back. If you get my drift. 🤣
Not a joke: one of George Floyd's criminal friends shot his grand-niece as they wanted a piece of the 27 million dollars.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
Why should you always be friends with an emo kid?
They always hang around.
It’s sad how my friend was struck from the medical register for sleeping with a patient.
He was a great vet.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.
My friend playing truth or dare asked me: "Dare".
My friends: "I dare you to go home."
"If you yeet one thing that has been yoted, the yeet gods will help you" - Chris Tyson, MrBeast's friend, and your mom >:)
I told my friend you should definitely quit smoking, but he could not find me because he was already up in flames.
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.
Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.