Fridge

Fridge jokes

Death

  • Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.

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  • Man

  • Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"

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  • Brick

  • Time for a story: There are 500 bricks on a plane, one falls off. How many are left? 499.

    What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator? Open fridge, put in elephant, close fridge.

    What are the 4 steps to putting a giraffe in a fridge? Open fridge, take out elephant, put in giraffe, close fridge.

    The lion king is having a birthday party. All the animals attend except one, who is it? Giraffe, he's stuck in the fridge.

    Sally wants to cross an alligator infested river. There is no bridge and the only way she can get across is by swimming. She swims across safely, how? The alligators where at the birthday party.

    Sally dies anyway. How? She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

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  • Community talk

  • I'm Gabe's (Mid-Western Motherfucker) old friend from when he visited toronto in the 2000's. I would like to say that you all changed him very much, when we met he was grumpy terrifying and rude, but in recent times he was happier and talking about you guys. My honest thanks for helping him be a better man and my apologies for his passing, I hope you will all remember him. (If you don't believe me he had his account saved on his fridge door and I will comment from his account on this post)

  • BRO- I- i took one piece of candy from the fridge and now I only have a mattress in my bedroom, guys I'm gonna cry 😭🤣