Figure Of Speech jokes
What do you call a fat duck?
Donald Duck.
Your secret is safe with me. I walnut tell a soul.
Stolen dad jokes: "I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered."
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 馃巶馃槀
Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?
'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!
Hi, I'm a skeleton and I know a skele-TON of jokes!
Do you think midgets start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?
I have a ton of work to do... A skele-TON.
Patient: Doctor, I feel like a needle.
Doctor: I see your point!
What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?
"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"
What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The Grim Sweeper.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
Q: What did Donald Trump say after America gave him the boot?
A: What am I supposed to do with one boot?
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.