What do you call an orphanage?
A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
A game that all orphans hate,
"Who's your Daddy?"
Why do orphans commit crimes?
To be wanted.
Why do orphans play GTA?
'Cause they're actually wanted.
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club.
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so I cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand, I'm glad to help.
Is it possible for an orphan to go on an away trip?
No, because they already are on one.
I woke up to my daughter riding me in bed. I asked, "What are you doing?" She replied, "Making a Creampie."
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"
His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."
The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"
"His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."
The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."
The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."
"No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
Why can orphans only hit a triple in baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Can't wait for the orphans to have their family reunion! Wait...
Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sister, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughters. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.
My sister keeps cursing... so I made fun of her... "fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk", fowl language is for chickens!
What’s the similarity between your uncle and your hands?
They can both do dirty things.
I just killed a family of five.
Now I’m an orphan.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple gets picked.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't go home.
Dad, am I adopted?
NO! Why would I ever choose you?
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
